The Love Confession 3.0

Life had been unfair or fair was it? The hustle and bustle of the rainstorm did not matter to me anymore as it always had. His face was all that my eyes wanted to see now on.
The wait brought back memories which never deemed in my mind. All those times when I had the chance of showering my love over him had now seemed vain.
I needed him now. For all the times when he begged for me, I let him down. So less i knew that fate would bring a surprise as such for me.
Scared had i been to admit my feelings then to the boy I had adored since I had baby feet and now, he was gone....
I still remember that day....that very day when i was all ready to admit my feelings to him. The special dress i had worn on that occasion still lay untouched in the cupboard after the dreaded day which changed the map of my life forever.
The day had started with excitement for me. Little had I known that the excitement would turn into depression. I was about to confess that I loved him dearly. The day before he had begged for the same to me. But negligence was all he had to accept. The way to his house seemed like a way to heaven that day for the least had i given the thought that it wasn't I who was on way to heaven but him. The day before had been his last day of survival. Least had I known that this would happen.....my heart cracked as I saw him motionlessly lying on the marble floor beneath. The flowers i had bought on the way to pleasure him after the confession had actually paid off. But I disgraced myself......
And here I am, his widowed wife, standing at his grave just like on the day I was going to tell him that our divorce had been cancelled.....here I am crying for the husband I once had for myself but not anymore. Here I am in the rainstorm wishing this all had never happened. Here I am confessing my love to him for the 365th time.....